Why I Broke All My Kids' New Toys on Christmas Morning

So last night, while my kids were sleeping like angels after wrapping themselves in presents (I swear it was more exciting for them than actually getting the toys), I made a bold move. You see, our house has been overtaken by this year's big Christmas haul of gadgets and games that all require batteries and instructions to operate properly. But being a lazy parent who doesn't want to be tethered to YouTube tutorials 24/7, I decided on a more... creative solution. I waited until the wee hours of the morning when Santa was making his final touches (don't tell him I said this), then went from room to room with my handy-dandy toolbox. For every toy that required assembly or had replaceable batteries (which is most of them), I just smashed it to bits. It started innocently enough, taking apart one Lego set to understand the pieces before carefully putting everything back together again. But then I got carried away. There was this fancy new remote control car with a million buttons, and in my genius moment, I decided to 'upgrade' its battery compartment by replacing it with random washers from my toolbox. And don't even get me started on the baby doll that needed its pacifier replaced - her mouth is now just an empty space staring at us like she's trying to figure out a mystery. Now here comes the fun part: Christmas morning arrived, and instead of kids screaming with joy as they unwrap their presents (which they did), I got to be the parent who explains why there are strange washers in every nook and cranny of toys. My 6-year-old looked at me with those big eyes while holding up his new robot with its battery compartment missing, and all I could do was give him a sheepish grin. I know, I know, it's not the most practical parenting move out there. But here’s to hoping that for today at least, we can pretend everything is fine and functional (except maybe the doll who lost her pacifier). So, did anyone else ever do something like this? Or am I just a completely insane parent?