I Gave My Best Friend's Son More Money Than His Parents Did For His Birthday

So last weekend was a big deal. My best friend Mary and her husband Tom have this awesome kid, Jake, who just turned twelve. I've known them for decades now; my kids grew up playing with theirs when we all lived close together back in the day. Jake's birthday rolled around, and as usual, I wanted to get him something nice without being too obvious or making his parents feel bad about not splurging more on gifts than they usually do. They have a tight budget since Tom retired early from teaching due to health issues last year. So this year, instead of a big present, I decided to give Jake some extra spending money. I handed him $20 at the party. He looked up at me with that knowing smile you get when someone tries to hide how much they're giving out, and he said something about getting ice cream with his friends later. It was meant to be subtle, but Mary noticed right away and thanked me profusely. Then she told Tom to match my donation. I could tell from the look on their faces that they felt guilty or maybe even a little uncomfortable. I walked away feeling like an asshole. While I didn't mean to make them feel bad about what they were able to afford, I couldn't help but think of all the other times when Mary and Tom went out of their way for me without asking anything in return. I guess this time it was my turn to step up a little more. So now I'm wondering if maybe next year I should just skip the birthday party altogether and send Jake something more substantial, like a gift card or cash directly sent to him so his parents don't have to feel guilty about accepting help.